Last night I was talking to a friend, and he mentioned a girl he had met the weekend before but didn’t hook up with. She seemed pretty interested in him that night evidently, but now the line has gone dead. I asked him for more details and he said they talked and drank together for a few hours, then she went home and he went his own way feeling good about their interaction. Why isn’t she contacting him now?
Simple. He didn’t stand out in her mind.
Any reasonably attractive girl who’s out drinking and open to meeting strangers is going to get hit on. A lot. A very conservative estimate would be that through the course of one night out, she will have 10 different guys come up and give a concerted effort to talk with her, kiss her, or have sex with her. The next day, if she’s talked to 10 different guys but only one of them got a kiss, who will she remember?
She remembers the guy who took it all the way. He pushed for the kiss, and probably tried to take her to his place. He took the interaction as far as it could go.
My friend objected and said he was just trying to get to know her and he wasn’t trying to hook up with her that night. Isn’t that sweet of him? He’s so kind and understanding, like a little puppy dog waiting for approval. But she went home and completely forgot about him. Think about it from her perspective – he wasn’t even interested in her enough to try to have sex with her. He didn’t even try to kiss her. If he’s not interested enough to go for it, she’s not going to be interested enough to let him.
Now she has most of those guys messaging her with the same boring stuff on Monday morning; how was your weekend, it was nice to meet you, did you have fun, etc. But the one she’s going to answer is the one that went for it and got the kiss. And that’s probably who she’s meeting next Friday night.